stress management strategies

The core of practical stress management that is most suitable for contemporary working people and student groups is never to force oneself to "quit emotions" or "eliminate stress", but to deal with it in layers based on the logic of "emergency flood discharge - source removal - long-term storage". There is no need to carry it hard, and there is no need to pursue a completely stress-free state. If the stress can be maintained within the threshold that does not affect normal decision-making and life, it is considered effective.

I worked on an e-commerce project before Double 11 last year and worked for 12 consecutive days. In the last three days, I slept less than 4 hours a day. That day, my hands suddenly went numb while facing the full screen of operational data sheets, I couldn't breathe, and my chest felt like a water-soaked sponge. At that time, my first reaction was not to pour myself chicken soup and "just hold on and I'll be over." I grabbed my phone and hid in the fire escape. I squatted on the steps and turned my phone on its flight mode. I counted my breaths without thinking about anything. When I reached the 17th round, the numbness in my fingertips slowly subsided.

It's quite interesting to say that there has been a lot of controversy in the academic circles about this kind of "instant catharsis": many scholars in the cognitive behavioral school think that this method treats the symptoms but not the root cause. It only takes 10 minutes to slow down, and the things that should be piled up are still piled up, but it is easy for people to develop the habit of escaping.； However, empirical research in clinical psychology makes it clear - if you forcibly suppress your emotions during the peak period of acute stress, cortisol levels will soar rapidly, and the risk of cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases and thyroid problems will increase by 2-3 times in the long term. To put it bluntly, during the peak ten minutes, saving your life is more important than anything else. There is no need to worry about whether the method is "correct". Someone can tear up two pages of waste paper, someone can yell out the window, or even squatting in the stairwell like me in a daze is completely fine.

After the panic has passed, go back and identify the root cause of the stress. Don’t label yourself as having “poor ability to withstand stress.” After I recovered, I copied all the 27 to-do items listed in my hand on A4 paper. I planned each item one by one. In the end, I found that 8 items were basic checking tasks that could be handed over to the interns. The other 5 items were useless work that I anxiously did in advance before Party A confirmed the needs. There were only 11 core items that really needed me to work on. I got off work on time the day after the split was completed, without even asking for overtime work.

The methodological differences in this part are actually even greater: Loyal supporters of GTD time management will repeatedly emphasize that all to-dos should be "outside the brain" and not piled in the mind to occupy cognitive bandwidth. As long as it is split properly, no matter how large the workload is, it can be broken down into small executable steps.； However, researchers in existential psychology will pour cold water on it, saying that many people feel stressed, not because they have too much to do, but because of the fear hidden behind them - fear of rejecting others and being disliked, fear of being scolded by leaders for not doing well, fear of not being able to compare with peers and being laughed at. Both statements are actually correct. If you really have more things on hand than you can arrange, split them up first, pass the blame, and eliminate unnecessary efforts. If you clearly don't have much to do but still feel anxious every day, why not find a place where no one is around and ask yourself whether it is that thing you are afraid of, or the evaluation behind it.

After solving the immediate troubles, if you still often feel tired at every turn and explode at the slightest thing, then you need to adjust your long-term way of dealing with stress. I used to read the argument that "pressure is motivation" every day on the Internet, and I believed it before. It wasn't until I went for a physical examination at the end of that project that I found two more nodules in the thyroid gland and a cyst in the breast, and I realized that this statement doesn't work for everyone at all.

There is a fierce quarrel between two completely opposite views on the market today: one group says that we should make friends with pressure, turn pressure into motivation for growth, and strive for more while we are young.； The other group says that stress is a health killer. You can run as far as you can, and a low-desire life is the ultimate destination. There is really no need to choose sides. My former partner in the same department is a typical big-hearted person who gets more courageous with every setback. The more urgent the project, the more excited he becomes. Now at the age of 32, he has become the head of the business department. His annual physical examination report is all green. He is suitable for high-pressure environments. ； There is also a former colleague who quit his algorithm job with an annual salary of millions last year to work as an information teacher in a middle school. Now he walks his cat and flowers every day after get off work, and goes hiking on weekends. His previous problem of relying on sleeping pills to fall asleep is completely gone. Who can you say made the wrong choice?

To put it bluntly, there is no universal standard answer to stress management, and no one requires you to be a superman who can handle everything. If you are out of breath today, squat for ten minutes, and tomorrow if there are too many things to do, throw away two things. If you really can’t bear it, it’s not a big deal to change the environment. Being able to live your life comfortably is more effective than any “correct stress management method”.