Tips to ease depression

Hold an ice cube in the palm of your hand for 10 seconds, exhale to the end out the window, and then take three deep breaths, and take a bite of something sweet and sour (such as iced orange, frozen bayberry, or even the first sip of iced cola). You will most likely be able to catch the downward spiral of your emotions first and prevent it from sinking deeper.

This is not some metaphysics, it is an "instant first aid method" that has been useful both in the visits and in my own tests that I have been doing for four years in emotional intervention. I once met a girl who was working on content in a large factory. Every time her work was rejected by the client, she collapsed and squatted under her desk crying. It was useless to "complain to friends" or "go out for a couple of walks". She would take out the popsicle that was always in the drawer, take a sip, and the ice would tingle, and her brain would instantly jump out of the endless loop of "Am I unable to do anything well?" Essentially, it uses the "grounding technique" in the mindfulness school. It uses strong sensory stimulation to draw your attention away from repeated negative ruminations and back to the current physical sensation. You don't need to learn any special meditation techniques, and you can use it at zero cost.

Of course, not everyone likes sensory stimulation. I have a client who is doing scientific research and has a very developed logical brain. When he feels uncomfortable, he grabs ice cubes and thinks, "Why am I so useless and still rely on this little method?", which makes him even more anxious. For this kind of friend, the cognitive behavioral method is more suitable: take a sticky note and write down the thoughts that are running in your mind. Even if it is "I am really bad" or "No one likes me", it doesn't matter. After writing, stuff it into the bottom of the drawer. This is equivalent to taking out the emotional garbage in your brain and putting it away. Don't let it occupy your running memory. This scientific research friend tried it for half a month, and said that every time after writing, he felt, "Oh, these thoughts are no longer in my mind, I can do experiments." The effect was much more effective than when he forced himself to read popular psychology science for half an hour.

There are always people on the Internet who say, "When depression comes, just let it out and just cry." In fact, there is a different clinical view - if you feel relaxed after crying, then of course there is no problem, but if you are already stuck in the mood of "I am so miserable" and you feel more and more wronged after crying for half an hour, then there is really no need to force yourself to cry. Psychodynamic counselors sometimes suggest that you give your current emotion a name, such as "that little depression that's bothering me again." Treat it as an uninvited guest. You don't have to chase it away. You should do whatever you want. It will sit for a while and feel bored and leave on its own, which saves you more energy than arguing with it for a long time.

As for methods such as exercise and social networking that everyone often talks about, you really don’t need to set KPIs for yourself. Don't force yourself to get up and run just because others say "running for half an hour a day can relieve depression". If you can't persist in running for two days, you will end up attacking yourself with "I can't even do this well". The laziest and most effective method I have ever seen was thought up by a young programmer: go downstairs after get off work every day, instead of going upstairs directly, walk around the unit building three times, counting the number of red cars on the roadside while walking, and go home after counting 10 cars. He persisted with this trivial matter for a month and said that his previous problem of lying in bed and scrolling on his phone until the early morning after work was mostly gone. He no longer always thought about whether there were bugs in the code he wrote during the day. This is actually "micro-behavior activation". It does not require you to expend too much willpower and there is no pressure to complete it. It will slowly drag you out of the state of "not wanting to do anything".

Oh, by the way, don’t think that these methods are “too small” and useless, and always want to find a once and for all solution to your depression. I have talked to many psychiatrists, and the consensus is that depression is like a seasonal cold. No one can guarantee that you will never have it. These tips do not prevent you from emo forever, but every time it comes, you have a small grip in your hand, so you don’t have to drop it too painfully. If you really feel uncomfortable for more than two weeks, remember to see a professional doctor or counselor. It’s not a shameful thing, right?